Q&A with God (Author: Ankur Mutreja)

Me: Did you have sex before creating the world?
God: With Whom?
Me: Was there nobody? Why didn’t you create somebody?
God: I need nobody.
Me: Then why did you create everybody?
God: To control.
Me: To control what? The world or yourself?
God: I don’t need any control.
Me: Nobody ever challenged you?
God: Who can challenge me?
Me: Those whom you created.
God: I will kill them if they will challenge me.
Me: What if everybody challenged you? Will you kill everybody?
God: Yes, of course.
Me: Then whom will you control?
God: I don’t need to control anything.
Me: But you did create the world to control it?
God: No. I just created everybody. World is what you call it.
Me: Then what is it if not world?
God: It is my personal creation.
Me: And who appreciates it?
God: Those whom I created.
Me: Is there a choice otherwise? Else won’t you kill them?
God: Do you want to be killed?
Me: I don’t think you can kill me because I don’t believe in you.
God: Your belief is irrelevant. My power is relevant.
Me: Ok. Kill me.
God: I don’t kill myself. My creations kill each other.
Me: Then who will kill me?
God: I don’t know.
Me: Then how will you kill me?
God: Whenever you will die, it will be me who would have killed you.
Me: And when would that be?
God: On Doomsday.
Me: And when would that be?
God: Before eternity.
Me: By any chance did you create that video game “Doomsday v Eternity”?
God: I created everything.
Me: I have an advice: Start again; this time create just one, fcuk him/her before you start fcuking everybody.
P. S. And do please use condom. I have serious doubt the way you have been fcuking everybody.

©2019 Ankur Mutreja